What did you want to be when you were growing up? It seems the most common dreams for young children are to become firefighters, police officers, doctors, nurses or ballerinas. The kids filled with extra energy say an athlete or a rock star.
For me, I wanted to be a commercial airline pilot. At the age of 6, I spent 11 hours flying the friendly skies, while traveling overseas and absolutely loved it!
The attendants put me to work passing out silverware before each meal and by filling simple passenger requests. In between jobs, I was permitted to sit in the cockpit while the pilots taught me how to read the gauges and explained the colored buttons. And yes, before exiting the plane, I was officially named as the flight’s honorary pilot and had my own [plastic] wings to prove it.
From that day forward, I set my sights on a flying career. Since there was an ocean separating my family, I had the opportunity to be a frequent flyer before the program was ever initiated. With each flight, I voiced my interest and was given the chance to learn from experienced pilots and have numerous conversations about the expectations.
Shortly after getting my driver’s license, I joined a youth flying club and became a regular tag along on private aircraft. By doing odd jobs at a small airport, such as waxing planes and painting hangers, I was rewarded with countless hours of flight time.
In high school, I applied and was accepted at a university, majoring in aviation technology. I thought my dream of becoming a pilot was within my reach, but instead, I was detoured.
The summer after graduating from high school, I lucked out and got a job working with the most advanced computer technology available. My boss and mentor, Hank, took me under his wing, so to speak, taught me about the up and coming future of computers, then led me down a path with greater opportunities. He also arranged for me to meet with a group of successful pilots to discuss the statistics of women pilots and the reality of making my dream come true.
While I was still determined to follow my dream, I was enlightened by the new information and my gut feeling was to reconsider. Knowing Hank had my best interests in mind and was willing to open doors for me in another direction, I decided to change my major to Computer Science and work toward obtaining my private pilots license. After all, I could always return for a degree in aviation technology at a later time, right?
Less than three years later, I was diagnosed with severe, crippling poly-articulate rheumatoid arthritis. When I learned of my diagnosis, the conversation was intense as the doctor explained how my disease is extremely aggressive. It wasn’t long before I was labeled as being disabled.
After a 25 year absence from flying, I attempted to return, but given my extreme limitations and the loss of performing simple tasks, I can no longer become a certified pilot. Although this disease has brought many positives to my life, I will always be disappointed knowing, I’ll never be able to fulfill a lifelong dream.
Regardless of how many times I review my childhood list of things to be, I’m still not finding where I said, “When I grow up, I want to be disabled.”
Has your diagnosis interfered with your dreams? Have you had to reroute your life plans because of an illness? What changes have you had to make? Looking back, was it a positive or negative?
