‘Paint on a smile’ … ‘Buck up’ … ‘Game face’ … ‘Fake normalcy’ … Sound familiar?
That’s what we do – and most of the time, we do it well! So well, in fact, that when the truth is revealed, we are rewarded with those five nasty words, “but you don’t look sick!”
Can you relate to the phrase, “winner’s curse?” The simplest way to define this contradictive term is by using a bidding example commonly done at auctions. Have you ever witnessed a bidding war, whereby one person out bids another for an item valued far less than the paying price? When you heard the sound of the gavel hit and the auctioneer shouted, ‘sold,’ did you ask yourself, “Why would anyone pay that much?”
Hence the name ‘winner’s curse,’ even though the bid was won, the new owner over paid and is not necessarily deemed ‘the winner.’ Or is he or she? How does the purchase price compare to an individual’s personal sense of value?
In my blog, “Keeping Score” (9/17/09), I share my secret coping method created years ago to aid in the daily fight against arthritis. By earning points every time I one-up Arthur, I’m fulfilling my competitive nature and gaining victories that keep me focused in a positive direction.
Some may look at the overall score and argue it greatly exceeds the points gained in daily battles, raising questions about ‘my wins.’ I’ve also heard comments related to paying a high price for a meaningless piece. (In other words, doing it myself when I could ask for help.) And then there’s, ‘having to look sick to be sick.’ Who decided that?
At the end of the day, can ‘winning’ be conceived as a curse? Is the real winner the one with the most points or the one who stays in the game? If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, is it a duck or do we make assumptions based on what is seen?
Although technically I’m still a contestant in the game of arthritis, experience qualifies me to be a referee. Given that, my ruling is, as long as a person goes to bed at night ready and willing to face the challenges of a new day, you’ve got spirit and you’re still in the game!
After all, “It ain’t over ‘til it’s over!”
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