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Paying it Forward

Have you experienced kindness and wondered how to repay the act?

By Annette Beach

I’m constantly in awe of the positives that accompany the negatives of my life! Whether it’s an illness, family affair, a series of circumstances or an isolated event, there always seems to be a balance of good with every bad.

When I reflect on the 24-plus years since being diagnosed with severe rheumatoid arthritis, my mind instantly fills with an endless list of negative experiences, consisting of pain and fear about the past, present and future. But ironically, as soon as my memory starts to scroll down the list, each negative is zapped by a positive, giving my experiences a twisted balance of sorts. (Of course it’s easier to see the positives when I look back rather than when I’m in the midst of a trial. But after realizing they’re always there, it gives me hope during times of crisis.)

Although physically and emotionally my days can be tough, people have a tendency to lighten the load in kind and supportive ways – and some I never expected. Acts of kindness, whether from a stranger or those we know, can make a difference in how we approach the difficulties brought on by life. To read an example of one experience, see my blog “Random Acts of Kindness” (4/20/09).

Many times I’ve been overwhelmed by the generosity of people within my community, as well as across the country - not only family, friends and neighbors, but strangers! People I’ve never met before, and in all probability never will, have reached out and showered me with kindness and support in a multitude of ways!
Years ago, I wondered if it was possible to pay back the goodness of those who’d given to me. And then I realized, the answer was simple. When people are kind, it’s because they want to be or perhaps they’re repaying their own debt of gratitude. The only real way for me to pay them back is by ‘paying it forward.'

Clay Walker is known for a song called, “The Chain of Love." It’s about a man who stops along the road to help a lady with a flat tire. When she tries to pay him for his troubles, he refuses and gives this advice:

“You don’t owe me a thing, I’ve been there, too. Someone once helped me out, just the way I’m helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here’s what you do. Don’t let the chain of love end with you.”

Have you been on the giving or receiving end of ‘the chain of love?' What have others done for you that eased your pain? Please share your experiences of ‘paying it forward?'

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29 Sep 2011, 15:15

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Louise

14 Dec 2010, 17:53

You can help others simply by buying an item from a website such as www.gifts-give.com or by participating in a special event listed on www.CausesCalendar.com

DRay

16 Nov 2010, 15:55

I believe in karma and in that, I try to live my life "paying it forward." I choose to believe that when I put positive energy out into the universe, that positive energy will eventually come back to me. Of course, this is not always easy. But it helps me keep my humanity in a world that seems more and more at odds. If I cannot do grand, sweeping gestures, I can still do little things, like letting a car merge or leaving a quarter in the shopping cart lock so the next person doesn't need to search for one (yes, I shop at Aldi). Even if no one else knows I have done something, I know. And it does come back to me, from the stranger who lends me his arm because a curb is too high to the barista who gives me a free coffee when I forget my wallet. Living with arthritis, I find myself needing help from strangers (a large curb, a tightly locked gas cap). Therefore it seems only fitting that I do what I can for whomever I can if only to pay back in my head the kindness I have felt in my heart.

Madison C. D.

11 Nov 2010, 18:30

To whom it may concern ; I write this letter to eveyone out there to ask that you pretty please help someone that does need help. I know this lady by the name of Penny M. she takes care of her disabled veteran father who is 77 years old she is not that old it is her father that is 77yrs old . Penny has a spinalcord injury and now told that she may have had a stroke she has to force herself to do everyday things she has arthritits in her whole body. I know her when she was able to drive a semi truck she had saved a lot of people who could of died ; or was going to die if she didn't help them ; she was able to get them the help that they needed she didn't ask for anything in return but their freindship and for them to live!also get the help that they needed from medical personal. that is all that she asked from them they got the help because Penny was able to be there for them when they were going to die or when they got hurt and needed help Penny was the one that ended up being there to help them so they live today because of Penny's love for people to have a better life than she did.This lady has suffered a life time of abuse yet she trys everyday to be a good; kind ; loving person it is not easy to do I am sure after all of the suffering this lady has has to go throgh in her short life time . she needs help now with her home she can't get help from anyone in the government she has even tried to talk to the state representative Mr. Terry Goodin who's office has not returned her phone calls lately ; and will not help her and her fahter who is a disabled veteran who fought for our country so that we would be free today to enjoy the free life that we have today just like all of the other veterans have done . she is afraid to ask for anymore help at all because she does't know where to trun anymore she has done all the things that she was told to do she has called all the people and places that she was told to call. Still no one will help her . She is scared because she is afraid of freezng to death this winter she needs help with the installtion on her home ; it needs house borad on the house and house warp ; windows and some doors for their safty ;Also some camreas because of being hurt and robbed . So I and a friend who can't help her and her father at all are requesting your help out there to please help this lovely lady and her faher out pretty please . We thank you kindly fo your help understanding Also your time . take care happy veterans day to all the vets all over the world and the ones that are dead they are in heaven now thank you for your fight for our freedom today .

yours truly
Madison C. D. a vetran myself.

David H.

11 Nov 2010, 18:15

I would like to say his to eveyone out there I know that someone needs help right now and I personaly can't help them both out at all if I could I sure would becuase I know that Penny herself has helped a whole lot of people she has saved some people while she was able to work. Penny has a spianl cord injury ; and she trys to take good care of her 77 year old disabled father who is a disabled veteran and she can't take care of her self at this time with out any kind of help they freeze each and every winter. the light bill company just started charging them more money for the same service that they have used now for year it has gone way to high that they can't afford to eat ; or get thier Medcines that they really do need to live on . they have to have elec. to heat the house they live in ; and cook ; to keep their medcine in the icebox. they have to have elec to even have water to drink and cook with to even bath in . they need help because Penny got taken by the people that sold them the house; they are no longer in business they done dirty to all of the people that ever bought homes from them; and now they asumed another name to get out of taking care of the problems that they coused these poor disabled people . they FREEZE IN THE WINTER EVERY WINETER AND I AM AFRAID THAT THEY MIGHT DIE IN THE HOME BECAUSE THE CAN'T GET THE HELP THAT THEY REALLY DESPERTLY DO NEED TO LIVE. I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANYONE DIE AT ALL LET A LONE FREEZE TO DEATH THAT WOULD BE A RALLY PAINFUL DEATH I THINK ANYWAY . SO IAM ASKING EVEYONE OUT THERE ANY WHERE TO PLEASE HELP PENNY AND HER FATHER SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE SHE HAD CALLED OUR STATE REPRESENTATIVE MR. TERRY GOODIN AND CAN'T SEEM TO GET ANY KIND OF HELP FROM HIM EITHER AT ALL AND SHE PAYS HER TAXES JUST LIKE ANYONE ELSE DOES. PENNY HATES TO HAVE TO ASK FOR HELP SHE IS THE KIND OF PERSON THAT IS ALWAYS HELPING OTHERS BUT NOW SHE NEEDS HELP AND CAN'T EVEN GET ANY KIND OF HELP AT ALL . MYSELF I AM A DISABLED VETERAN ; AND I A SURE YOU IF I COULD HELP HER I SURE WOULD . SO IF THERE IS ANYWAY THAT ANYONE OUT THERE THAT CAN OR COULD OR EVEN REALLY WOULD HELP HRE GET HER HOUSE REINSTALATED AND HOUSE BOARD PUT ON THE HOUSE A LONG WITH HOUSE WARP PUT ON THE HOUSE FOR HER AND HER DISABLED VETERAN FATHER TO AND HELP WITH A GENARATOR FOR WHEN HER ELEC GOES OUT IT WOULD BE REALLY KIND AND NICE OF YOU OR ANYONE AT ALL . SHE HAS EVEN TRIED TO GET REMC LIGHT COMPANY THAT SHE HAS TO TRY TO GET THEM TO HELP HER WITH THE ELEC . BUT THEY WILL NOT HELP AT ALL NO ONE WILL HELP . PLEASE HEL HER AND HER FAHTER SHE IS REALLY GETTING SCARED NO ONE IN HER FAMILY WILL HELP HER AT ALL SO PLEASE BE KIND AND HELP THIS KIND CARING LOVING WOMAN OUT . SHE HAS BEEN ABUSED ALL OF HER LIFE AND STILL SHE TRYS TO BE THERE FOR OTHERS ALWAYS . SO NOW THAT SHE NEEDS SOME HELP AND NEEDS SOMEONE TO BE THERE FOR HER THERE IS NO ONE AT ALL SO I MYSELF ASK FOR HER ON HER BEHALF SOMEONE OUT THERE IN THE REAL WORLD HELP HER AND HER FATHER .

THANK YOU ONE AND ALL FOR REALLY TAKING THE TIME TO MAKE THE TIME TO READ THIS LETTER AND IF YOU SHOULD EVER BE THE ONE OR OTHERS TO HELP HER I THANK YOU KINDLY FOR REALLY TAKING THE TIME TO MAKE THE TIME FOR THIS LOVELY LADY AND HER FATHER . I WISH EACH AND EVERYONE A HAPPY THANKSGIVING AND A VERY MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS . SOMEONE MAKE THIS LOVELY LADY WHO HAS NEVER HAD ANY KIND OF CHRISTMAS SINCE SHE WAS JUST A LITTLE GIRL MAKE THIS TIME A CHRISTMAS THAT SHE WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT SOMEONE OUT THERE REALLY DOESE CARE ABOUT HER AND WHO SHE IS GOD BLESS ONE AND ALL IF YOU DON'T MIND ME SAYING GOD BLESS YOU TO ANY OF YOU . IF YOU DO MIND I AM SORRY I JUST WISH ALL THE BEST IN LIFE . THANK YOU AGAIN FOR YOUR TIME

YOURS TRULY
DAVID .

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Paying it Forward

Have you experienced kindness and wondered how to repay the act?

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